I have not written lately. To be 100% honest, I have been thinking about writing and thinking and thinking, but not writing. In a review of the blogs I have posted, something quickly became apparent, there is absolutely no focus. The whole thing is just a mishmash of ideas and while some of them might sound good, none of them are connected. This format would be fine if I really didn’t care about readers, I do though. I want people to come and visit my blog and have a good idea what to expect. I’m not saying I want every post to sound the same, just that there be a general subject for my blog and let each post be about something specific within that subject. I know that seems like basic knowledge, I guess I had been missing that point.
So that is what I have thinking about; a theme for my blog. I had a lot different ideas pop into my head. How about politics? No good, I am an absolute centrist. How about writing? Maybe, but I should figure how to do that before I take on that subject. How about a raunchy blog from the male perspective? Not really my cup of tea. Sports? I thought possibly, but when it comes to sports I just want to be a fan, I don’t even want to try to be objective, so sports is out. There were a plethora of other ideas, but most just didn’t have enough of a sticking point to keep my interest over the long haul. That was what I was looking for; something that could hold my attention and be of interest to write about and maybe even benefit myself and readers. Then I started thinking about helping myself.
As I am sure I have mentioned before or maybe I haven’t, I am somewhat of a fuck up. I am pretty smart, I have been told highly intelligent (by others and myself) but I digress. I have fucked up a lot of shit, for as smart as I can be I can be equally stupid. Some of my failures are a result of laziness or not being properly motivated, I don’t know maybe I smoked too much weed in my time. One thing that has been constant for as long as I can remember is my complete disorganization. I am the ultimate “wing it” person, the closer I get to total chaos the more in control I feel, but it is a huge deception, eventually the wave crests and I find myself submersed and all the bad decisions that I have made to that point all collapse in on me. These situations always come back to haunt me, one way or the other. Karma is a bitch!
It all comes down to excuses, for no reasons are real, usually when the universe lines up against you it does so for a reason, that’s just basic Karma- good for good, bad for bad. I have made my share of horrible choices and have suffered bad Karma as a result, sometimes instantly most times unexpectedly. It usually hits right when I feel like I am on top of the world and all of sudden the trap door releases and I find myself freefalling to a seemingly bottomless pit of self remorse. Karma stands above smiling at me, Karma always smiles, for you always get what you deserve, good or bad. Which leads me back to the point, you can create your own good Karma, or at least that’s my goal. Going forward, that shall be the point of my blog, creating good Karma for myself, by Helping Myself- and that will be the name of the blog Helping Myself.
I have no idea where this will lead, but I have a pretty broad subject area to work with. I will aim to improve my life and share my experiences along the way. On this journey I think I should begin with Organization. I think being more organized will lead to overall better decision making and improved control over my life. For me this is really going to be taking baby steps, but if I can quit smoking (which I have for over two months) I can do anything. Over the next couple of weeks look for posts about how I am trying to organize my life, it may take some time, but I will get there.
There will be one more random post before I start the themed blog. It was something that happened the first day of mine and my wife’s vacation; it really sucked and nearly killed our vacation. To give you an idea of what to look forward to- imagine that a person calls your phone, leaves a message, think that they hang up, but they didn’t….